I am like the countless thousands of passionate artistic people who loved creating imagery, loved getting the feedback for images that people enjoy, and it seems like that would always be a facet of my "self".

With the downturn of the photography market, pandemic, and now post pandemic recession, I am no longer as passionate about photography as I used to be.  Before all this, I would always have a decent camera within reach, wherever I went.  I was experimental when there weren't paying gigs, looking for images that would help get me in front of paying clients who loved the work I was producing.  Now, I don't go many places due to residual pandemic fears and the need to "work from home" at my day job in cybersecurity.  I may have a cellphone with me if I venture out, but I've not been to the great outdoors, Asia or Europe to take those wonderful travel photos I dreamt I'd be taking.

Once in awhile I break out my Leica Q2 and charge the forever depleted battery and then find myself trying to remember which buttons did what function (being a Canon guy for so long, it was not "by feel" like it was with my 5D MKIII or earlier models.) I feel a bit clumsy as I try to manually adjust ISO/shutter/aperture thru the menu...and then think "wow...am I no longer as good as I used to be??"   

I believe you have to practice, have your finger on the shutter every single day or you lose the natural part of being a photographer, making the camera settings adjustment almost by muscle memory.  

I fear if I don't get back to that state again, I may lose my passion for the work altogether.  I never thought I'd be THAT person.  I've always associated my love for that craft as being part of my persona....have I lost that?  I hope not, but then again it seems tough to justify all the hardware and software...my Mac wants to be fed, but yet she hasn't been doing much retouching in the past 3 years.

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